37 weeks

Ok, so now that I've finally gotten over the shock of possibly having a baby before the end of May, I'm more ready for her to come now, early in May. (And, the house and nursery are in alot more order so I feel better about my "to-do" list). In fact, I'm thinking sometime this week would be good... how about Wednesday? (I do want to wait until at least Monday, since my dr is not on call this weekend, but Adam's parents are out of town until Tuesday night, so that's why Wednesday would work well. And, Adam's grandparents from California are in town and they are flying back to CA on Friday so it would be great for them to be here when she is born. So, not before Wednesday but definitely before Friday. Ok, glad we have that settled.)

Anyway, on a more serious note, part of the reason I've been feeling like I'd rather her come now rather than later is that I'm developing a (stronger) paranoia about stillbirth. Sometimes I don't feel her move as much as I used to and it can make me panic. I know that there is less room for her to move than in previous weeks... and I also think she is not a super active baby... but still, like my doctor said, if she was born now at least we could take care of her, and we can't really do that for her when she's still in the womb. The non-stress tests that I've been getting are supposed to give us some assurance for about 4-5 days, but it cannot predict things like cord accidents, etc. At times I've been tempted to consider his offer to do an amnio and go ahead and induce, but I don't think I'd seriously opt to do that without good reason.

It's been interesting to see people's reactions when I tell them I'm at a 4 (especially with the amount of effacement and her low position, etc). So many people want to know how I'm not already in the hospital and how I am not in pain! I guess it does seem backwards to be progressing so much without contractions (this is not the way I expected it to happen), but from what little research we've done, it can certainly happen this way (especially if my progesterone shots are indeed what is keeping me from going into full blown labor). I've been told lots of women walk around for weeks at a 4 (which has been discouraging), but I just dont understand how I can go for too much longer without my water breaking, especially since Ivy is so low. Who knows.

Well, I guess that's it for now...